Hospitality Can Transform Your Team

Coach Walter Kondratowski brings us this week’s Fertilizer.

If You Can Be Anything, Be Kind

I am not often envious of my daughter’s wardrobe, but she has one shirt that I covet. On the front, it says “be kind,” and on the back, it says “everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about.” It’s a simple concept that has become my personal mantra as a worship leader and church planter. 

Everyone who walks through the doors of our churches is bearing a burden we may never fully know about, and when it comes to our ministries, the one thing we need now more than ever is…hospitality.

I bet you thought I was going to say kindness, didn’t you?

The Apostle Paul, in his argument for the preeminence of Christ, writes in Colossians 3:12-15, 

“Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful.”

The Umbrella of Hospitality

This is an important theme of Paul’s letter to the Colossians: a world that does not see the supremacy of Christian community will never see Jesus as supreme.

When I read this passage, the first thing that hits me is the qualities which we are called to put on. It’s easy to focus on them individually and miss the forest for the trees. Even though Paul does not explicitly use the word, when I combine the qualities of compassion, kindness, humility, meekness, patience, forgiveness, and love, I believe that all of these fall under the umbrella of hospitality.

Biblical hospitality is defined in the Baker Encyclopedia of the Bible as “benevolence done to those outside one’s normal circle of friends,” or as Jesus put it, “welcoming the stranger,” a concept He made clear in Matthew 25.

The Cause of Anxiety and Depression

Anxiety and depression run rampant through our volunteer teams. We often act more like strangers on a mission than actual friends. We are isolated by our devices and divided by our politics. You do not need me to tell you that the world is a sad and lonely place. People are finding their meaning and purpose for life, not in the safety of human community, but in the soft glow of electronic rectangles.

As more people turn to digital companions, we are in jeopardy of losing what makes us human: our humanity. We are messy and broken, yet we need each other if we ever hope to pull through. The pandemic made this abundantly clear.

While we were in lockdown, my wife and I got hooked on a show called Ted Lasso. One of the many iconic one-liners is, “There is something worse out there than being sad, and that’s being alone and being sad.” The pandemic taught us all that isolation kills. However, many are still choosing to face our sadness alone. 

A Worship Team of Strangers

Even in the strongest relationships, the people on our teams are often still unknown to us. We are a culture of strangers. 

The Apostle Paul was often attempting to foster community amongst the believers. He knew that the only hope for the Church was that believers stick together. While the Church’s mission is to reach the world with the hope of the gospel, an easy place to start may be within our own teams.

Create Belonging

What if people knew that, no matter how estranged they might be from the rest of the world, they belonged with you? What if instead of sharing our surface-level hurts in the five minutes before band rehearsal, we chose to dig deeper into the lives of our volunteers and get honest about the perilous journey we are on? What if we let the light of Christ shine into the darkness through the open door of kindness and the warmth of welcome?

I have committed my life to the Matthew 25 ideal of active hospitality. At our church, the mission is clear: we feed hungry people. We do this through an actual meal, in addition to Bible study and singing. Welcoming strangers, opening my heart, and sharing my story are necessary aspects of building community around a shared meal. On this church planting journey, I have learned that people are wary of open invitations to strange places, yet in-person kindness is often the doorway to real welcome.

You can Change the World

In a time when folks are busier than ever, the Church must offer them more than just something else to watch. You are that something. Your warmth, your welcome, you are what makes the difference. I encourage you to begin pursuing active hospitality with your teams. Take them out for a meal. Invite them into your home. Once in a while, pick easy songs, cancel band rehearsal, and spend that time intentionally building community around a Matthew 25 objective. In other words, carry the light of Christ into the darkness and do it together.

As you do, God will work powerfully through you and your team to forge real and lasting relationships.

So, as my daughter’s shirt reminds us: be kind. It is often the first step toward active hospitality where strangers are invited to step out of isolation and into the welcome of God’s family.

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Check out Walter’s breakout “How To Deal With Difficult People” and hear more pithy wisdom from Ted Lasso applied to worship ministry.

-Dave Helmuth
(purchase my book, "Worship Fertilizer: (the first hundred)" HERE)

Hospitality Can Transform Your Team (Nº 446)